The Client-centred Blog

Uncertainty is inevitable, insecurity is optional

On Monday we had our second live day of ‘The Freedom of Mind Programme’ and we gathered at the inspiring Henley Business school on the bank of the river Thames.

The brilliant Kim Hare lead the day and one of the posters she put up on the wall read:

Uncertainty is inevitable, insecurity is optional

We, humans, have a fascinating relationship with certainty, don’t we?

So often we hang on to what we know just because it’s familiar. I remember once hearing Richard Bandler (co-creator of NLP) say:

“The desire to stay with the familiar is the strongest force in the human personality.”

We fool ourselves that what we know is safe and comfortable and what we don’t know is full of danger. And yet this is so often our biggest downfall.

I gave a coaching demonstration at an event a while back and the guy that volunteered to be my ‘coachee’ wanted to become a professional coach.

But he was worried about making mistakes and as a result, he was procrastinating and making no progress.

So, with his permission, I enquired as to why he would expect to be proficient at something he had no experience at?

He laughed out loud because he immediately saw the ill-logic of his situation.

How can you move forward in life and grow if you’re not willing to step into uncertainty?

Do you know what the biggest megatrend of our time is?

Renowned social forecaster Patricia Aburdene deeply researched this question and discovered that…

The quest for spirituality is the greatest megatrend of our era. Gallup research found that 78% of people need to experience spiritual growth.

Why is this?

Because we are beginning to realise that no matter how much we chase external objects (money, power, possessions, etc.) none of it can ever give us what we really want.

We will NEVER find certainty (or security) in the external world because it simply does not exist there.

The only certainty is that there is no such thing as certainty.

This is especially so in a world where things are changing faster than ever before.

The happiest, most content and high-functioning people, who experience life as fresh, rich, and fun (like we all did when we were little kids) live in the unknown.

What does this mean?

If you go and see a movie you don’t want to know the end before it arrives, do you? The enjoyment is in how it unfolds in each moment.

Being present to life in each moment means living in an ambiguous place. But rather than something to fear it is the bridge to a deeper connection to who we really are.

John Dashfield

John Dashfield spent 14 years as a self-employed adviser. Since 2006 he has been a coach, mentor and author helping advisers create transformations in their business and personal lives.



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