One of the most liberating realisations I’ve had is this:
You can never want something for your client more than they want it for themselves.
That’s why the most powerful version of financial planning doesn’t happen when you sell it – it happens when clients sell it to themselves.
Let’s explore why that is true, and how you can create the conditions for it to happen naturally.
Why trying to convince people backfires
There’s a brilliant insight from Seth Godin that captures this perfectly:
“People don’t believe what you tell them.
They rarely believe what you show them.
They often believe what their friends tell them.
They always believe what they tell themselves.”
That’s why financial planning has the greatest impact when clients convince themselves of its value. Once they see it as their own idea, motivation and actions take care of themselves.
When selling creates resistance
I worked with an adviser who wanted to shift from a transactional model into a financial planning-led business.
She had always excelled at building relationships because she was genuine, straight-talking, and trustworthy. Her clients loved her.
But when she started trying to ‘sell’ financial planning, something surprising happened. Clients weren’t buying in. She received pushback and resistance.
Why?
Because she was explaining financial planning as a concept – what it is, how it works, and why it’s valuable.
But to clients, it sounded abstract and disconnected from their lives.
Financial planning is a meaningful experience, not a concept
I recognised her struggle because I’d been through it myself when I first became a coach.
In the beginning, I tried to explain coaching – what it was, what it could do, why it was a worthwhile investment. And just like her, I hit a wall of resistance.
Everything changed when I stopped explaining and started creating an experience.
Once people experienced what coaching could do for them, it became obvious. I didn’t need to convince anyone.
The same is true for financial planning. If you try to sell the idea, people hesitate. But if you create the experience, the value becomes self-evident.
What clients really care about
Here’s the truth: most people don’t care about the mechanics of financial planning.
It’s like when you take your car for a service.
Do you want a lecture on how the engine works? Or do you just want to feel confident your car will get you to where you want to go?
The only question that really matters to clients about financial planning is:
“Will this help get me what I want?”
The shift from an idea to an experience
So, I asked the adviser, ‘Why have you stopped being yourself?’
She paused – and then it clicked. She’d been overcomplicating things. All she really needed was to do what she’d always done best, connect, ask questions, listen, and create an environment where clients can think for themselves
The moment she shifted back into simply being curious about her clients’ lives, something changed.
Clients stopped resisting. Their interest grew. Financial planning began to sell itself.
Why did this happen?
Because when people start to become clear about what they truly want, their motivation to take action also starts to increase.
They don’t need convincing. They don’t need a sales pitch. They just need someone to create the space where their own clarity can emerge.
That’s the real secret: don’t push financial planning. Create the experience and let clients sell it to themselves.
PS. Read more about the power of connection when selling your services. Click here.
