Do you ever catch yourself trying to prove your value to a client or potential client?
If so, you’re not alone because most of us have done this.
It’s easy to slip into “impress mode” and this is especially in the sales process.
But here’s the thing: it doesn’t work. In fact, it tends to do the opposite.
This article is about freeing yourself from that burden so you can convey value naturally—without trying.
Why we try to prove our worth
Many advisers carry a subtle but false belief: ‘clients are buying me.’
That thought creates pressure to perform and make a good impression.
But what underlies this is fear.
And what this does is turn your attention inwards. Suddenly, you’re asking yourself:
*How am I doing?
*Do they like me?
*Am I saying the right things?
These are the least useful questions you can ask. They take you out of the conversation and into self-evaluation mode.
The consequences of trying to prove your value
Ironically, trying to be impressive has the exact opposite effect you’re hoping for.
It tends to:
*Lower the quality of your listening.
*Trigger defensiveness in the other person.
*Reduce trust and rapport.
*Make clients less willing to open up and be vulnerable.
Do qualifications impress clients?
I once shared an office with an adviser who had so many letters after his name, he practically needed an extension to his business card.
He believed qualifications would impress clients and win them over.
Yet his client relationships were often shallow. People didn’t warm to him, so he kept chasing the next credential, thinking this one would do the trick.
The truth was, when he was relaxed, he was fantastic company. People loved him. But as soon as he entered a sales situation, he tensed up. And that—not a lack of qualifications—was the real problem.
What clients actually want
Trying to prove your value doesn’t reassure anyone. It creates a barrier.
What reassures clients most is when they can see, hear, and feel that you are genuinely interested in them.
They want to know you care.
That’s the foundation of exceptional, transformational client relationships.
Caring is your value
David H. Maister, co-author of ‘The Trusted Advisor’ said:
“People don’t care what you know until they know that you care.”
Look at the advisers who have the biggest impact in their clients’ lives.
What stands out? They care deeply about the quality of their clients’ experience. Their caring shines through everything they do.
And here’s the paradox: the most powerful way to convey your value is to take you completely out of the picture.
When your focus is solely on serving your clients—going beyond their expectations, helping them feel understood and safe—you have nothing to prove.
Your value becomes self-evident.
PS. Do you need sales techniques to win business? Click here to find out.
